
I wish I had it in me to let you know
that all of this is just for show.
Don’t believe the things I say
’cause I walk between the cracks on the floor
to avoid lying while holding the truth.
Your arms imprison me. I never want to escape your embrace.
Your warmth is comforting. You hold me close, but my mind pulls me into another world.
My heart didn’t want to follow, but it drowned in my thoughts. Now, it’s completely soaked.
Will you get bored with me?
Are you thinking of letting go?
These thoughts haunt me. This is why I always lose.
I want to feel you as you hold me, but I’m afraid
so I touch you with numb hands
and kiss you with cold lips.
Would you forgive me for pretending to let you in?
Would you let me try to get close to you again?
May I admire your silhouette and sweet smiles?
May I close my eyes and pretend you are mine?
Can I tell you a secret? Will you keep it safe?
I’m afraid of loving. A broken heart could cost me my life.
I say I’m alright, but I don’t recognize my voice in the crowds.
Have I been lying to myself? Is this what betrayal feels like?
Gosh…
You are pretty in my thoughts, pretty when you visit my dreams.
You are a pretty thought, even if you’re not for me.
Would you forgive me if I told you I was scared?
Would you think I’m a freak, or would you understand my fears?
You know, I always thought sad beginnings can never have happy endings.
Either way, I’m sorry you had to meet me this way.
Love, Alyazya
Nice…✨✨
LikeLike
Great piece! Intriguing, and full of awesome lines. Good Job!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Nice…✨✨✨
LikeLike
Reblogged this on Notes and commented:
Before I even read anything, the name “Alyazya” was enough to attract my attention to these awesome-beyond words that feel like such a genuine and true expression of a lost love.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you for your support! I’m happy to see that you’ve enjoyed this. Lost love is difficult to move on from. So many what ifs. So many what could’ve beens.
LikeLiked by 2 people
You’re welcome 🙂 Right in the heat of the moment (loving), whatever we do comes natural to us. Sometimes we ourselves don’t know who we actually are until we interact with another human via love. None of those “what ifs” or “could’ve beens” matter long after the love is lost. Because, according to my philosophy, a love that is lost, was never a two-way love to begin with. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Sometimes, it’s goes both ways but it gets lost because we let it slip away. Our fears, traumas, and pride come in the way. Humans are far too complicated. Some of sabotage our relationships and burn our loved ones down.
LikeLike
it seems that you consider yourself as someone who’s difficult to love. it won’t be a problem, if the one beside you, is patient enough to understand and go to any lengths, to be able to be with you. 🙂
LikeLiked by 3 people
That post reads like an episode of Grey’s Anatomy – so full of emotion, drama and love that I could squeak (if’n I was that kind of a guy (which I’m not)). 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
Beautifully melancholic, well-penned!
LikeLike
Thank you
LikeLiked by 1 person
Beautiful and touching. Thank you for sharing.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much 💙
LikeLike
This is incredible. I feel all of these words. Thank you!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you 💙
LikeLike
Pure and exquisite, love this piece 💗
LikeLiked by 1 person
💙
LikeLiked by 1 person
This one will make many ppl cry. You touched the odd chords of many hearts.
Is it your personal exp or otherwise?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Both glad and sad that you find it relatable. It’s something a lot of people probably went through
LikeLike
Yeah . Flowers bloom, glasses break,
LikeLiked by 1 person
Beautiful👌💫
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you 💙
LikeLike
Chick told me two years in a relationship, she knew she wasn’t ready for a relationship…she wanted it, but fought it. Too often the case.
LikeLike
oh, sorry you went through that, I hope you’re all better now 😦
LikeLike
Thank you, kindly, Alyazya. I’m well over it, now. It was another take on the “confusion of love.” To want something, get it, then realize you don’t want it or that person. How did you resolve your relational dilemma, conflict?
LikeLike
I love this❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
This piece resonates with theanxious-avoidant within me – the paradoxical need to connect that coexists with a fear of closeness
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ah, fear of closeness can ruin relationships 😦
LikeLike
I am afraid of the cause of losing this someone. The most lonely person in the world is the one afraid to lose. Because she’s afraid to take chances. I know this because I’ve been there. I was scared to let them in my heart, afraid of a heartbreak. It doesn’t end well. You gave to take chances and still stay strong.
LikeLike
You have to take chances and stay strong
LikeLike
Very true. It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I’m sorry to hear that. I hope you’ve been able to get over your fear
LikeLiked by 1 person
I have found someone I love, but even the slightest turbulence leads me to wonder where it all is leading…scared after having taken a chance! 🙂
LikeLike
Don’t be! What’s the worse than can happen? We all get hurt, rejected, whatever… at the end of the day, we’re still alive. It’s not the end of our lives.
Please don’t overthink 😭 Fear ruins beautiful things
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you. Will try to remember that during my negative moments.
LikeLiked by 1 person
If you ever want to talk, I’m here. I go through the same thing although to hate admitting it
LikeLiked by 1 person
Amazing post
LikeLiked by 1 person
scared and sacred have the same alphabets
LikeLiked by 1 person
Reblogged this on The Reluctant Poet.
LikeLike